Monday 17 May 2010

DVD Review: Reykjavik Whale Watching Massacre


The vast majority of foreign horror flicks as of late have been brilliant. Whether it's Spanish, Japanese or French, they all seem to carry the punch, albeit a disturbing one, which makes the entire film stand out. Will Harpoon: Reykjavik Whale Watching Massacre, an Icelandic horror film, stray from the pack?

A mixed group of tourists in Iceland head on a whale-watching expedition. After their Captain (the original Leatherface, Gunnar Hansen) falls short due to a fatal accident, they flee to a fellow whale-hunting ship, unaware of the knife-happy family living on board.

Setting up the film brilliantly with real, and incredibly violent, whale-hunting clips, the tone is undeniably gritty. A tone which, unfortunately, doesn't stick for more than two minutes. Blurring the line at times from horror to spoof, it's slightly bewildering at how wrong everything included in the film was.

Every character serves no purpose. Whilst a heroine is distinguished, she neither looks nor lives up to the title, making the film spiral into a series of uninspiring, uninteresting situations with a trio of villains so dry and, frankly, rather hilarious - despite their unexplained urge to inflict pain.

With the film entirely devoid of suspense from both it's characters and it's situations (the chase sequences are incomprehensibly flat), the only thing left unscathed are the deaths which, for the film, are the only things left with the slight possibility of resurrecting it from the very grave the film will undoubtedly be thrown into once i'm finished with this review ( and breathe!). Sadly, these are neither worthy of acknowledgement - par the only death to receive a response from me which includes an actual harpoon!

Ridiculously below-average, you would think a horror film based upon a whaling ship would be more inventive with their kills; a gutting of some sort at least?

Sadly, the film isn't what i expected, and most definitely does stray from the string of macabre foreign horror films. Whilst entirely disappointing, the film does gain credit from a death nearing the end including Free Willy himself, but loses out almost completely due it's lack of detail. Also, the harsh Icelandic setting couldn't have fitted a horror film more perfectly. Unfortunately, it was wasted upon this heap of dung.

Personally, i would have rather watched Leatherface unleashed upon the whaling ship donning his legendary chainsaw. It'd have been a vast more entertaining than this failure.

1.5/5


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